Break Up. Break Down. Break Open.

“Love is rarely killed in a single moment.  It’s death comes as a result of countless slights, ignores, denials and less respect and honor than it deserves.”

Loving something requires more courage than any other journey we embark on.  You risk everything, leaving yourself open to pain and loss.

I actually appreciate break ups.  Maybe not in the moment, but after crying in the bathtub, drinking a bottle of wine, and eating too much ice cream, THEN I actually appreciate breakups.

Break Ups Aren’t About Boys
I recently went through a breakup but the last time I was this heart broken it wasn’t because of a boy, it was because of a job.

I loved my job and for a long time everything was great.  I poured my heart and soul into this job, but much like this past relationship it started taking more than that it was giving and I allowed it.

Breakups aren’t about boys, they are about losing something you wanted.  The reason breakups happen is because something isn’t working:

      • Maybe it is the push you need to go in another direction.  
      • Maybe you are what isn’t working and you have something to learn.  
      • Maybe the relationship just isn’t serving you any longer.  

Instead of focusing on the loss, the pain or the circumstance you can’t control or change, use Breakups as a chance to create the space for something you need.

Break Open
When things hurt, we want to numb the pain.  Anything to make that awful feeling go away but that merely delays the problem, it doesn’t actually make it go away.

They say time heals all wounds.  Bullsh*t.  Doing the hard work heals all wounds.  And yeah, time doesn’t suck either.

There is no magic pill, no quick fix, and if you manage to avoid dealing with it now – it will come back around I promise!

This isn’t a guarantee that it will make you will feel better.  I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but this is going to hurt.  Growing pains always do.

Learn to love the Break Up.  Why?

    • It forces you to reflect, evaluate and hopefully learn something
    • People you love, who really love you, rally around you
    • It is a chance to do things differently
    • The pain of loss means you took a risk and put yourself out there
    • You feel … deeply.  This is a gift.  Most people walk around numbing their emotions
    • Whether you like it or not, you grow and change
    • You get the chance to do things differently

When you are dealing with a breakup, instead of breaking down … take a long look in the mirror, put on your big girl pants and choose to be Broken Open instead.

2 thoughts on “Break Up. Break Down. Break Open.

  1. Pingback: 10 Lessons From Breaking Open |

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